Tuesday, October 13, 2009

My Previous Business Venture


In 1988, I was ready to ride the wave of the future...right onto a naked woman covered in fish and rice! Fresh out of the prestigious Wharton Business School at the University of Pennsylvania, I had nothing but ambition in my heart, dreams in my head, and an expulsion notice in my pocket! Truly the world was my oyster...or should I say my spicey tuna roll, haha!?!?


After securing substantial venture capital from some coked out Goldman Sachs traders desperate to impress a Japanese client who had sniffed out their lack of actual business acumen, I opened the first in what I hoped would be a chain of family-oriented nyotaimori restaurants. I called the place "The Barber Shop Floor" after a joke my old college roommate made about his Greek girlfriend...I'm not sure I really got the joke, but the name had a folksy ring to it.
Unfortunately, like so many great ideas, the restaurant was shut down before we even completed our soft opening. Due to health concerns and prudish notions regarding what parts of the female body children should be allowed to see concealed only by edible seaweed, I was shut down by shortsighted local government officials. Sioux City Iowa will never know how much that restaurant could have stimulated their tourism and hospitality industries.
Above I've included an artists rendering of a scene from my restaurant concept. Unfortunately, I lost a lot of money once short-selling shares of Adobe, and I still refuse to use Photoshop.

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